Mietzke's Holden Adventure

We have a lot of guests in the village right now. It has been fun watching them enjoy the fresh snow. There is a lot of fun and laughter on the sledding hill! The hill has not gotten very much action for a while because it hasn’t snowed in weeks. Nyrie and I even sledded down to school this morning. I love having new guests in the village. It helps me to constantly see things through fresh eyes. I was able to catch up on a lot of my work that I have not had time for over the Easter holidays and it felt good to have things come together today.
The girls are hanging out with their friends in the other room and rocking out! I am always surprised at how many rock songs they know because I haven’t been listening to much music lately. Our friend Karen has made them some great music mixes and they love to have dance parties to them.
It is strange to listen to how their conversations are changing. Even their descriptions of things seem more grown up. I am so proud of them and I love watching all of their changes. I am a lucky mama.

Long Post Warning

It has been a really busy week, but I have to say, I have never had more fun with church! For the Easter Vigil tonight we are re-enacting Old Testament Bible stories. There is Noah and the flood, The Red Sea where the waters part and the Israelites are saved from Pharos army. My favorite story is the story of the valley of dry bones where the bones are brought back to life, which will be done with Dancing and a strobe light. There is the story of the Fiery Furnace, and the creation story. There are songs interspersed and each of the stories are being presented in a different way. Some are being acted some danced some sung and Dave has been working on lighting to go with all of it. People have been preparing for Easter all week. We have been dying eggs, singing, decorating and rehearsing. The whole village was a hive of activity today! The service doesn’t begin until 8:00 this evening and will go until sometime after 10:00, with a feast to follow!
The Fireside room looks beautiful for tomorrow, with spring banners and full of flowers! I had a great group of people helping me with decorations today and it turned out so beautifully! The whole week has been packed with Easter prep, and nice services with good music. There are so many talented people up here!
The Easter Vigil was so much fun and came off without a hitch! The readers did such a great job and really allowed for the actors to have some fun! Dave’s lighting was glorious and really helped set the mood for the service. The children’s choir did a great job with their songs and the dancers and drummers were fabulous! There was the perfect balance of humor and reverence.
Jordyn was in the Dance troop that danced the dry bones to life with a strobe light flashing and drums beating. It turned out so cool and Jordyn really had a lot of fun doing it. Nyrie dressed up in a lama costume, for the Noah’s ark reading, that she and my friend Jenna made. She looked sooooo cute and when she walked her lama butt bounced which was hilarious. Both girls sang in the kid’s choir and seemed to really enjoy it. The vigil ended with a celebratory feast in the dining hall with delicious breads and cookies champagne and sparkling cider. It was a night to remember.
This morning we got up and the girls found the Easter baskets that Ama and Apa had sent and spent the morning singing and eating goodies and playing. Then we went down for the morning Easter service, which ended in a hunt for Easter baskets and a village wide Easter egg hunt in the dining room because it snowed hard all day today after not snowing for several weeks.
After the Easter egg hunt we had a wonderful brunch with some amazing food! The kitchen staff went all out today! After Easter brunch and the big Easter Day service we were free to do as we pleased. It felt so good to move through this week with fun, humor and work and to see it all play out! I am glad that it is over though and I am looking forward to a couple of days off.
Several of the people in the village organized a spa day with Yoga classes, massages, Reike, foot washing, and all sorts of other things. It sounded like a lot of fun but I needed just to be quiet this afternoon. I spent a little time trying to e-mail until the power took my e-mail attempts out a few times, and then I came home and took a long, wonderful nap with Dave.
We woke up at 7:00 pm and headed down to a night in the tropics courtesy of the utilities department. They had smoothies and entertainment and ended with watching a remake of the movie South Pacific. It was a lot of fun they heated the fire side room so much that it was almost to hot. I have never had such a jam packed Easter.
When I awoke this morning I realized that this was one of the first Easters that we have missed with Dave’s side of the family in the last thirteen years. I think we have only missed one other. I found myself thinking of them often throughout the Day and wondering how their Easter was going. I was missing Tom’s deviled eggs and all of the good rolls and sweets Tam makes and the almond puffed pastries that Mary makes and fighting Tom and Mary for the asparagus. I miss hunting for Eggs in the field behind the house with the kids and spending the day chatting and relaxing. I also missed the Easter Breakfast at the church. I was flooded with really good memories of our family and I am sending you all hugs and kisses.
One of the things that I have really enjoyed about Holden is the spirit of celebration. In our “normal” lives we seem to end up so busy with things and miss opportunities to celebrate. I have been thinking a lot about the importance of traditions and ritual, and especially about celebrations. I love the act of coming together to honor being together and celebrate what a gift life really is. I have also been thinking a lot about how to bring this gift of celebration into my life when I leave Holden. It seems like something that we are really missing, or loosing in our culture.
I have really enjoyed finding people who share a common experience of God with me. This connection has deepened my faith and allowed me to really explore my roots without loosing my own sense of the divine among us. I have found many Christians here who I deeply admire and who share a love for people from many diverse backgrounds and beliefs, as well as caring deeply for the earth. I love the freedom of expression, this has been a really safe place for me to question and grapple with what it is that I believe. I have been really thankful for the opportunity to be a part of the services and to explore various aspects of the Christian faith. As I learn more I feel even more solid in the fact that we are continually missing the essential parts of the teachings of Jesus. I recently had the opportunity to try to find out things about Jesus through reading the bible. We were making collages for the stations of the cross and trying to tie in how the life of Jesus could be relevant to current world issues.
What I found was a man with a tremendous love for people. He taught things like do not judge, serve the poor, love your neighbor, practice peace. I felt like I was reading about him for the first time. Here was a man who spoke out against the religious right of his time, who practiced non-violence and taught forgiveness. Here was a man who spent time with the despised of society, and loved them. I found that he is really someone I can admire. I think I have spent so much time rebelling against the religion aspect that somehow I missed how positively radical he was in the things that he stood for. I found myself deeply moved by such a life and it made me think a lot about my own.
You will have to excuse me I am all over the place today but I haven’t had much time to write so I thought I would try to catch you up with some of my thoughts for the last week. I have loved the snow. It felt unexpected and was actually a wonderful Easter treat. It looks like we might have met our snow goal of 300 inches today. I am excited for fresh snow so I can go out on a hike tomorrow. The snow has been nasty for the last few weeks making hiking difficult and snowshoeing slow and arduous. The whole village felt nestled in tonight and watching South Pacific was a blast!
I was watching the girls today and they are growing up so fast. I love watching them in their freedom up here. They are both blossoming in ways I never could have anticipated. They are finding new talents and pieces of their personalities are becoming stronger. I love watching them grow and develop. It is wonderful to watch them in there relationships with others they have an amazing ability to connect and express themselves. They are both learning both how to participate and how to say no to participation when they are not up to it. Jordyn is getting really good at recognizing when she needs space and taking it. Nyrie is really enjoying trying all sorts of new things out. I am so thankful to be able to have them be a part of this community and really exploring all the facets of it. I also love that wee don’t have to lock our doors. I love the feeling of safety. I love not hearing gun shots at night and I love that there are no squealing tires and people yelling curse words in the streets. I love how well I am sleeping at night and I love seeing my family so much through out the day. I love that we get to eat three meals a day together and I love how the other people in the village care for my children.
Well, Blessings to you all, my love to you on this night of Easter I hope you are well and good.
Angela

There’s something going on here and it’s pretty cool. Here it is Easter and not only do we all have our Christmas lights up but they’re all still lit. There’s three feet of snow on the ground, and it’s snowing, how are we to hide Easter eggs?

Angela organized another Vespers, she and some of the other villagers made photo collages of issues for prayer. Then she found verses to go with all of them. Finally the collages and verses were put on crosses throughout the village, and we all walked around read the verses, prayed and lit candles for the issues depicted there.

What a busy little place Holden village is right now. I feel like it has been non stop movement since I got back from Canada. Last night we had an amazing dinner in honor of Saint Patrick day with corned beef and cabbage and broiled vegetables and soda bread and baked honey apples. It was an amazing feast!
People have been gathering in the dining hall batik dying eggs and putting together collages for a meditation/prayer vigil. Others have been sewing. It has been fun to be in the dining hall like an extended living room working with others on projects. The psanky eggs have been a real hit and many people have been having a blast doing the batik and dying process.
We have also been busy practicing drumming for several of the services coming up, and the high school dance team is going to be dancing to the drumming. Any way it is busy around here, and the Easter week begins tonight with a really full week ahead of us.
Dave and his friend Daniel have been busy digging snow caves today. They even have a tunnel that goes between the two caves. Jordyn, Nyrie and I went for a walk and gathered armloads of pussy willows. They are so soft and pretty all fluffed out.
Last night Dave and I went for a walk to the labyrinth. The snow was so loose that we post holed the whole way, but it was sure beautiful out there. The moon came out from behind the clouds and the mountains have changed so much with the melting snow. It was also just nice to get some time together after having been gone for so long.

It is beautiful this village filled with mud and snow
As rivers in the street thaw and freeze throughout the day
Creating patterns on the ground
It is beautiful, this village, with people drumming and dancing
for a promise, for hope
These people that make up this village are glorious with colored eggs and reaching arms
With a willingness to serve others with such kindness
This village is beautiful in its struggle for truth
In its desire for connection
In its ability to love through conflict
In its forgiveness and letting go
of the large and the small
The village is business and respite
It is creative and lethargic
It is awake and sleeping
It is a party and a curl upon an old couch by the fire
It is lonely and abundant in connection
Convenient and inconvenient
It is faith and the lingering question
It is a living duality
It is changing moment to moment
Day to day
This village is beautiful

musicians:	Instrumental Prelude A few minutes before vespers begins, as people are coming in.
reader I:	The Lord be with you.
All:	And also with you.
reader I:	At Holden Village it has become our pattern once a week to gather in prayer around the cross. This is a simple service of intercessory prayer. It is a time for silence and stillness, as we immerse ourselves in scripture, song, and prayer.
reader II:	Hear the word that came to Jeremiah from the Lord: Go down to the potter’s house, and there I will give you my message. So I went down to the potter’s house, and I saw him working at the wheel. But the pot he was shaping from the clay was marred in his hands; so the potter formed it into another pot, shaping it as seemed best to him. Then the word of the Lord came to me: O house of Israel, can I not do with you as this potter does? Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in my hand.
reader I:	Just as the potter shapes a vessel, so does God shape each of us. Formed out of dust, holy breath, and love, we are made to be filled with grace, so we may pour out that grace for one another. Through prayer, we reach from our depths, and ask God to fill all of our hollow places. We give thanks for our wholeness, and for what each of us as God’s vessel can hold.

CHANT

reader I:	Often we do not feel whole. We are acutely aware of our brokenness, of the cracks, splinters, and shards that fall away from the vessels God has made. Guilt, shame, frustration, despair, bodily pain, depression they mar our shape and dampen our hopes. We feel unable to offer ourselves to God and each other, as we feel imperfect and unworthy to receive God’s healing.
reader II:	But the point is not to be perfect, to say the perfect thing, dance the perfect dance, sing the perfect song, live the perfect life. The point is the presence of God in spite of the cracks and the broken pieces-- the point is the presence of God’s life and light shining even, and amazingly, through them.
reader I:	A reading from Leonard Cohen: Ring the bells that still can ring, Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.
reader II:	What can fill the cracks, but God’s love? Forget about being perfect. Forget about using the right words in prayer. Forget about what you think you have to be to serve as God’s vessel. Instead, simply allow God in, bringing holy light through the cracks, reshaping you to wholeness. Feel the light inside you, moving into all your hollow places, filling you with God’s grace.

CHANT

reader I:	When we begin to sing together again, you are invited to come all you who long for healing and light a candle as you pray, an invitation to the light of Christ to come into your dark places and into the cracks in our world. If you would like others to gather around you in prayer and with the laying on of hands, come and light a candle at one of the bowls. If you would prefer to pray alone, please come and pray at one of the boxes.
reader II:	A reading from Rumi: Don’t turn your head. Keep looking at the bandaged place. That’s where the light enters you. And don’t believe for a moment that you’re healing yourself.
reader I:	Come to the cross, to Christ, to pray. For Christ is broken with us and for us and fills us with the light and grace of God.

CHANTS AND EXTENDED TIME FOR PRAYER

reader I:	Let us pray. O God of our making and our molding, our shaping and reshaping, we thank you for our lives. Fill the cracks in us and in our world with your light and grace. Just as the potter shapes the vessel, shape us to do your work. Then enter us body, mind and spirit, we pray, and heal us of all that harms us. In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.
reader II:	You may remain for prayer, or you may leave quietly. Go in peace, filled with the light of God.
All:	Thanks be to God.
musicians:	Instrumental Postlude for an additional five minutes or more.

A Vespers Setting by Erik Haaland

I have been back at Holden for almost a week. My trip to Canada was a difficult one. I was very sick while I was away and realized, in that place of vulnerability, how very remote Holden is from the outside world. I could only connect with my family via computer and sometimes it was actually difficult to find a computer I could use and even then I was hungry for their voices and the comforts that only my family can offer me. While I was out I had a deepening realization of how the world goes on without me at a pace I feel hard pressed to keep up with. So many of my family and friends are dealing with huge transitions many of them very painful and life changing and I feel so far away from them and sometimes at a loss for how to support them.
I feel spoiled here at Holden. When I returned I was greeted with such genuine kindness and love and interest in my life and my journey. We somehow have the time to really see each other to ask questions and to stay and listen to the answers. This time is invaluable and I feel seen and heard and accepted even in my awkwardness (of which there can be a lot). As I struggle with the knowledge that people I love are hurting I feel that there are places built into Holden for me to grieve and ache for those things that I am powerless to change, and there are places here to find renewal and worth. These things are all true in the outside world also; but the time piece is a factor. I felt like so much of the time I was running at a pace where I didn’t really see things, and I was bombarded constantly by images and messages that consumed my own ability to process.
I miss my people, my family and friends that have know me in all of my screwed up splendor. I miss being able to connect on a regular basis in a way where I can see and hear how, and where people are in their process. It sometimes feels like this writing thing takes so much time and conveys only a portion of a person, and I miss the rest.
On the other hand I am so thankful for this experience of time and community. I am thankful for being in such a great place in my marriage and my life. I feel like both Dave and I are deepening in ways that I could have never imagined possible. This may seem like a strange blog entry but I wanted to somehow get back into writing on here and I have so many emotions from the last two weeks rolling around in side of me that I have been at a loss for words. So this is a message to all of my friends and family out there in the “real “world. I love you! I think about you and pray for you daily. I miss you and I am with you in heart.
On another note, I stepped back into Holden right before Holy week and there are so many things to plan. We are doing a big Easter vigil with many traditional stories acted out and danced with drumming and singing and costumes and visuals. It is going to be a lot of fun but also a lot of work. It is strange to try and gauge how people feel about this season. Many people here have had varied experiences with religion (including myself) and as I am part of the planning and creation of services I keep trying to think of ways in which we can experience these things new, with life and love, with a deepened awareness of the worlds struggles but also with an emphasis on the grace and goodness of God. Holden has offered a place for me to experience some of the really fun things about tradition, and creation. I feel like I am healing some of the anger and pain I have towards pieces of organized religion. I am able to experience some of these things in a new way, and see where my emotion about ways in which I have seen God misused in religion, can be renewed. I feel that through this I am gaining an understanding of why people hold on so tightly to fixed ideas, and I am seeing where compassion could get replaced by dogma, and I feel free from it. There is value to tradition, that I have kept myself from experiencing out of a fear based reaction to religious piety. It can be fun and thought provoking and a deepening experience.
Any way, what I am saying is that I am enjoying the process of trying to see this with new eyes. I am enjoying working through my own judgmental fixed ideas and I am enjoying creating it and experiencing it in a new way for myself.

It is so good to be back in the village. I am finally feeling a bit better. I spent my week in Vancouver being sick as a dog. I had a fever of 103 one of the days and couldn’t even make it to class. This flue really took it out of me and has lingered for about 11 days.
I drove down from Vancouver on Saturday and made a wrong turn before reaching the border heading east way out of my way and didn’t figure it out until I had traveled quite far out of my way. When we finally reached the border it was getting Dark, and we didn’t make it to Seattle until 9:30 and I decided to get a hotel room and drive to Chelan early in the morning. I got to the Boat dock about an hour and a half early and sat looking out on the water anticipating seeing my family and Keith, Karen and Lyla. The boat ride up was nice and I felt like I would burst as we came around the corner and I saw everybody on the dock. I had missed my family so much and I had been very sad to miss Keith, Karen, and Lyla’s visit. I left my things on the boat dock and headed up to Stehekin with everyone for the Art exhibit party. It was fun to watch Lyla in her zestful glory and so good to be with Dave and the girls again.
I loved my Holden reception! Everyone hugged me and let me know that I had been missed. It always feels so good to come back here and receive such kindness!
I was shocked to see how much the snow had melted while I was away. The village looks similar, but there are places where the ground is peeking through. The snow around the chalets and lodges has shrunk at least a foot if not two. The snow is getting dirty in places where the mud has been tracked from the road.
It was so fun to hear all of the stories of Lyla’s visit. She made quite an impression on the village. The village needs a bit of waking up now and again and it sounds like Lyla brought everyone to attention with her liveliness. Three is one of my favorite ages because you can be sure to expect the unexpected.

The trees are all getting covered in white again. It’s crazy I still look around in amazement at the beauty of the scenery around me. Every time the clouds change the shadows on the hills, or the bright sun hits the water in the creek. Even after three months I continue to be surprised by the vistas surrounding me.
I have been hoping for one more good snow storm before the spring thaw, maybe this is it. We’ve had a couple of warm-ish weeks and the snows really starting to melt. It would be great to cover up the sloppy wet stuff that’s on the ground now with another ten inches of fresh new snow. It’s been so slippery that I haven’t wanted to go out hiking in it much at all lately. I know we’re going to have plenty of slushy days to come, but I can’t help wanting one last dumping of snow.

It’s soooo quiet in the village right now. There are only two guests right now along with all of the staff. Tonight at dinner there was just the low murmur of conversation. It’s quite a change from even yesterday. I think that tomorrow I may try get out for a hike.
It’s also real nice to have Angela home again, and to get to hear all about her classes. On Sunday when Keith and Karen were leaving we all went to Stehekin to see the Holden Art Show in the gallery there. Ang had made it to the boat that morning and joined us for the art show. I was real impressed with the art work, I had seen the picture Ang took while installing the exhibit, but it was much more striking in person. There is a lot of talent in the village not the least of which is Ang but I’m a little biased.
I have been working on the rehabilitation of one of the walk-in refrigerators in the hotel. It is one of those projects where we started out to just replace the refrigeration units, and found a little patch of rot, so we took down some of the insulation and found a little more rot. The more we peeled away the worse it got until it has become a total rebuild project from top to bottom, with some interesting twists and turns that wouldn’t have been there had we set out to rebuild the whole thing in the first place. None of this is getting Koinania remodeled, which is supposed to be my main focus. It has been a fun project for me though because I have gotten to work closely with Jeff the refrigeration guy, and I haven’t gotten to work with anyone else for quite a while. It’s nice to have someone to talk ideas through with.
Tonight was shop night where the villagers can come in and use the wood shop to work on projects. Jenna wanted to make tumblers out of old wine bottles. She looked on the internet for some plans on how to do it. It was a fun project for the evening. We scored the bottles with a glass cutter and heated the score line with a candle then plunged the bottle in a bucket of ice water. The rapid temperature change broke the glass on the score line with a satisfying pop. She’s going to sand the edge to smooth them out enough to drink from.